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MARRIAGE, FAMILY, AND CHILDREN

 

Pentecostal Match Making

"Then I said, 'Close your eyes. Can you see your husband now?' 'Yes, I can see him clearly.' 'Okay. Let's order him how. Until you see your husband clearly in your imagination you can't order, because God will never answer. You must see him clearly before you begin to pray. God never answers vague prayers... They were happily married in that church, and on their marriage day her mother took that paper written with the ten points, and read it publicly before the people, then tore it up."

Paul Yonggi Cho, with a foreword by Dr. Robert Schuller, The Fourth Dimension, 2 vols., South Plainfield, NJ: Bridge Publishing, 1979, I, p. 20f.

 

 

Lutheran

"Children are the most delightful pledges of a loving marriage. They are the best wool on the sheep."

Martin Luther, What Luther Says, An Anthology, 3 vols., ed., Ewald Plass, St. Louis: Concordia Publishing House, 1959, I, p. 137. 

 

"Therefore let every father of a family know that it is his duty, by the injunction and command of God, to teach these things to his children, or have them learn what they ought to know."

The Large Catechism, Sacrament of the Altar. #87. Concordia Triglotta, St. Louis: Concordia Publishing House, 1921, p. 773. Tappert, p. 456. Heiser, p. 215.

 

"This a true definition of marriage: Marriage is the God-appointed and legitimate union of man and woman in the hope of having children or at least for the purpose of avoiding fornication and sin and living to the glory of God. The ultimate purpose is to obey God, to find aid and counsel against sin; to call upon God; to seek, love, and educate children for the glory of God; to live with one's wife in the fear of God and to bear the cross; but if there are no children, nevertheless to live with one's wife in contentment; and to avoid all lewdness with others."

Martin Luther, What Luther Says, An Anthology, 3 vols., ed., Ewald Plass, St. Louis: Concordia Publishing House, 1959, II, p. 884. Genesis 24:1-4. J-328

 

"The world says of marriage: A short joy and a long displeasure. But let it say whatever it please. Whatever God has created and wants is bound to be a mockery to it...He who is married but does not understand married life can never live in it without displeasure, trouble, and misery."

Martin Luther, What Luther Says, An Anthology, 3 vols., ed., Ewald Plass, St. Louis: Concordia Publishing House, 1959, II, p. 885. Proverbs 18:22. J-327

 

"Ah, dear Lord God, marriage is not something natural and physical; but it is a gift of God, the sweetest, nay, the most chaste life; it is above all celibacy. But when marriage turns out badly, it is hell."

Martin Luther, What Luther Says, An Anthology, 3 vols., ed., Ewald Plass, St. Louis: Concordia Publishing House, 1959, II, p. 888.

 

"Whoever intends to enter married life should do so in faith and in God's name. He should pray God that it may prosper according to His will and that marriage may not be treated as a matter of fun and folly."

Martin Luther, What Luther Says, An Anthology, 3 vols., ed., Ewald Plass, St. Louis: Concordia Publishing House, 1959, II, p. 891. Genesis 24.

 

"The husband should take the initiative and contribute toward keeping unity and love in the marriage relation. But he does this by using reason and not force and by letting things pass without reproving his wife. This he should do because woman is a frail creature and does not have the courage and stout heart of a man. They are easily disturbed, take something to heart quickly, and are moved to joy and sorrow sooner than men."

Martin Luther, What Luther Says, An Anthology, 3 vols., ed., Ewald Plass, St. Louis: Concordia Publishing House, 1959, II, p. 903. 1 Peter 3:7.

 

"Marriages in which both husband and wife are contrary are the common variety, as the proverb has it: "Three things are rare but dear to God: the unity of brethren, the love of neighbors, a man and a wife that agree together," (Ecclesiasticus 25:1). But the reason why this so rare is that people enter upon this kind of life without prayer."

Martin Luther, What Luther Says, An Anthology, 3 vols., ed., Ewald Plass, St. Louis: Concordia Publishing House, 1959, II, p. 903. 1 Peter 3:5ff; Ecclesiasticus 25:1.

 

"It is impossible to keep peace between man and woman in family life if they do not condone and overlook each other's faults but watch everything to the smallest point. For who does not at times offend? Thus many things must be overlooked; very many things must be ignored that a peaceful relationship may exist."

Martin Luther, What Luther Says, An Anthology, 3 vols., ed., Ewald Plass, St. Louis: Concordia Publishing House, 1959, II, p. 905.

 

"For this reason there is so much care and unpleasantness in marriage to the outward man, because everything that is God's Word and work, if it is to be blessed at all, must be distasteful, bitter and burdensome to the outward man."

Martin Luther, Sermons of Martin Luther, 8 vols., ed., John Nicholaus Lenker, Grand Rapids: Baker Book House, 1983, II, p. 56. Second Sunday after Epiphany John 2:1-11

 

"God's Word shall do it, by which all things are made, preserved and transformed; that Word which turns your water into wine, and distasteful marriage into delight. That God has instituted marriage (Genesis 2:32) the heathen and unbelievers do not know, therefore their water remains water and never becomes wine; for they feel not God's pleasure and delight in married life...."

Martin Luther, Sermons of Martin Luther, 8 vols., ed., John Nicholaus Lenker, Grand Rapids: Baker Book House, 1983, II, p. 57. Second Sunday after Epiphany, John 2:1-11, Genesis 2:32

 

"In the first place, it is indeed a high honor paid to married life for Christ Himself to attend this marriage, together with His mother and His disciples. Moreover, His mother is present as the one arranging the wedding, the parities married being apparently her poor relatives or neighbors, and she being compelled to act as the bride's mother; so of course, it was nothing more than a wedding, and in no way a display. For Christ lived up to His doctrine, not going to the rich, but to the poor; or, if He does go to the great and rich, He is sure to rebuke and reprove, coming away with disfavor, earning small thanks at their hands, with no thought of honoring them by a miracle as He does here."

Martin Luther, Sermons of Martin Luther, 8 vols., ed., John Nicholaus Lenker, Grand Rapids: Baker Book House, 1983, II, pp. 55f. Second Sunday after Epiphany John 2:1-11

 

"This is a true definition of marriage: Marriage is the God-appointed and legitimate union of man and woman in the hope of having children or at least for the purpose of avoiding fornication and sin and living to the glory of God. The ultimate purpose is to obey God, to find aid and counsel against sin; to call upon God; to seek, love, and educate children for the glory of God; to live with one's wife in the fear of God and to bear the cross; but if there are no children, nevertheless to live with one's wife in contentment; and to avoid all lewdness with others."

Martin Luther, What Luther Says, An Anthology, 3 vols. ed. Ewald Plass, St. Louis: Concordia Publishing House, 1959, II, p. 884. Genesis 24:1-4.

 

"People who do not like children are swine, dunces, and blockheads, not worthy to be called men and women, because they despise the blessing of God, the Creator and Author of marriage."

Martin Luther, What Luther Says, An Anthology, 3 vols., ed., Ewald Plass, St. Louis: Concordia Publishing House, 1959, II, p. 907. Lectures Genesis 30:22-24. 

 

"Whenever the Word of God has a foothold, there the devil will be. By the agency of his factions he will always build his taverns and kitchens beside God's house. So he did at first, in Paradise. In the family of Adam he entrenched himself, establishing there his church."

Martin Luther, Sermons of Martin Luther, ed. John Nicolas Lenker, Grand Rapids: Baker Book House, 1983, VIII, p. 198. Tenth Sunday after Trinity, 1 Corinthians 12:1-11.

 

"Of Civil Affairs they teach that lawful civil ordinances are good works of God, and that it is right for Christians to bear civil office, to sit as judges, to judge matters by the Imperial and other existing laws, to award just punishments, to engage in just wars, to serve as soldiers, to make legal contracts, to hold property, to make oath when required by the magistrates, to marry a wife, to be given in marriage."

Augsburg Confesion, XVI. #1-2. Civil Affairs. Concordia Triglotta, St. Louis: Concordia Publishing House, 1921, p. 51. Tappert, p. 36f. Heiser, p. 14.

 

"Children should pay close attention to this Gospel lesson, so that they learn from it how to fear God. For Christ spoke these words with a deeply troubled heart, and He wept bitterly over the fact that this beautiful city would soon be horribly and so totally destroyed, that not one stone would be left on top of another."

            Martin Luther, Sermons of Martin Luther, The House Postils, 3 vols., ed., Eugene Klug, Grand Rapids: Baker Book House, 1996, II, p. 365. Tenth Sunday after Trinity Luke 19:41-48

 

"In all simplicity and without any disputing, children believe that God is gracious and that there is an eternal life. Oh, what a blessing comes to the children who die at this time! Such a death would, of course, cause me extreme sorrow, because a part of my body and the mother's body would die. These natural affections do not cease in the pious, as those who are without feeling and are hardened imagine, for such affections are the work of divine creation. Children live with all sincerity in faith, without the interference of reason, as Ambrose says: There is lack of reason but not of faith."

            Martin Luther, What Luther Says, An Anthology, 3 vols., ed., Ewald Plass, St. Louis: Concordia Publishing House, 1959, I, p. 142. A. Lauterbach, Feb. 26, 1539

 

"But He has given and entrusted children to us that we should train and govern them according to His will; otherwise He would have no need of father and mother. Let everyone know, therefore, that it is his duty, on peril of losing the divine favor, to bring up his children above all things in the fear and knowledge of God and, if they are talented, to let them learn and study so that they be of service wherever they are needed...And because this commandment is being disregarded, God is punishing the world so terribly that there is no discipline, order, or peace. We all complain of this state of affairs but fail to see that it is our own fault."

            Martin Luther, What Luther Says, An Anthology, 3 vols., ed., Ewald Plass, St. Louis: Concordia Publishing House, 1959, I, p. 140f. Large Catechism Ten Commandments.

 

"We should deal with children in such a way that they do not fear their parents, but that they know that they are offending God if they do not fear their parents."

            Martin Luther, What Luther Says, An Anthology, 3 vols., ed., Ewald Plass, St. Louis: Concordia Publishing House, 1959, I, p. 142.

 

"Chastize them when they deserve it, but accompany the correction with affectionate words so that they do not become disheartened and expect nothing good from you. It is very bad if a son loves someone else more than his father. The father should give some sort of proof that there is no intention entirely to crush the child. The Law alone serves no good purpose; in fact, it is intolerable."

            Martin Luther, What Luther Says, An Anthology, 3 vols., ed., Ewald Plass, St. Louis: Concordia Publishing House, 1959, I, p. 142. V. Dietrich, 1533 Ephesians 6:4.

 

"You see, then, that by nature all children are disobedient to father and mother. Therefore if a child is to honor father and mother from the bottom of its heart, as this Commandment requires, the Holy Spirit must bring this about through grace; nature is not equal to the task."

            Martin Luther, What Luther Says, An Anthology, 3 vols., ed., Ewald Plass, St. Louis: Concordia Publishing House, 1959, I, p. 143. Exodus 20:12.

 

"Love toward their mother is not so great in children as the love of their mother toward them, as the proverb has it: Amor descendit, non ascendit, Love is a plant that grows downward rather than upward."

            Martin Luther, What Luther Says, An Anthology, 3 vols., ed., Ewald Plass, St. Louis: Concordia Publishing House, 1959, I, p. 138.

 

"The first destroyers of their own children are those who neglect them and knowingly permit them to grow up without the training and admonition of the Lord. Even if they do not harm them by a bad example, they still destroy them by yielding to them. They love them too much according to the flesh and pamper them, saying: They are children, they do not understand what they are doing. And they are speaking the truth. But neither does a dog or a horse understand what it is doing. However, see how they learn to go, to come, to obey, to do and leave undone what they do not understand...These parents will, therefore, bear the sins of their children because they make these sins their own."

            Martin Luther, What Luther Says, An Anthology, 3 vols., ed., Ewald Plass, St. Louis: Concordia Publishing House, 1959, I, p. 139. November, 1516 sermon Fourth Commandment.

 

"Even the heathen say, that is, daily experience teaches: Summum ius, summa iniuria, Strict justice is the greatest injustice. We may say exactly the same thing of grace: Mere grace is the greatest disgrace (Ungnade). Just so a father can perform no act that is more unfatherly that sparing the rod and allowing the little child to have its own wanton way. For by such foolish love he finally raises a son for the executioner, who will later on be obliged to raise him in a different way - with a rope on the gallows."

            Martin Luther, What Luther Says, An Anthology, 3 vols., ed., Ewald Plass, St. Louis: Concordia Publishing House, 1959, I, p. 139f. 1534 Psalm 101.

 

"The apostle does not mean to say that children are not to be rebuked or beaten, but that they are to be chastized in love; but parents are not to vent their furious temper on them, unconcerned about the way to correct the error of their children. For when the spirit has been cowed, one is of no use for anything and despairs of everything, is timid is doing and undertaking everything. And, what is worse, this timidity, implanted during the tender years, can almost never thereafter be eradicated. For since they have learned to be frightened at every word of their parents, they are subsequently afraid of even a rustling leaf or a tree."

            Martin Luther, What Luther Says, An Anthology, 3 vols., ed., Ewald Plass, St. Louis: Concordia Publishing House, 1959, I, p. 412.

 

"If children do not accept the Gospel, one should not for this reason leave or disown them; but one should take care of them and provide for them as for the very best of Christians; and their faith we should commit to God, provided that they are obedient in other, purely external matters. For externally wicked conduct and deeds parents should and can restrain and punish, but unbelief and inner wickedness no one can restrain and punish except God alone."

            Martin Luther, What Luther Says, An Anthology, 3 vols., ed., Ewald Plass, St. Louis: Concordia Publishing House, 1959, I, p. 145.

 

 

Roman Catholic

"If anyone says that the sacraments of the New Law were not all instituted by our Lord Jesus Christ, or that there are either more or fewer than seven, namely, baptism, confirmation, the Eucharist, penance, extreme unction, ordination, and marriage, or also that some of these seven are not truly and properly sacraments, let him be anathema."

[Session VII, Canon I] Martin Chemnitz, Examination of the Council of Trent, trans., Fred Kramer, St. Louis: Concordia Publishing House, 1986, II, p. 21.

 

"Mary taken up into heaven has the first place among the saints; she is the queen mother of all the human family, and therefore, we believe she protects all of us, and hears our prayers."

Kilian Healy, O.Carm., The Assumption of Mary, Wilmington, Delaware: Michael Glazier, 1982, p. 116.